Hey Girls,
Ever heard that saying if you want to hear God laugh, than tell him your plans? I think that's a stupid saying. It bothers me that people would even believe something like that. Why would God laugh at the plans he puts in our hearts? I mean, sometimes I bet we do tell God some ridiculous things sometimes but when something is actually near and dear to our hearts, God would never laugh at us. God gives us desires and ideas for the things he wants us to accomplish. I mean, sometimes sure, we come up with things that have nothing to do with God, which is why we continually need to seek out his will and surrender to his control over our lives.
It sometimes seems that people have a lot of misconceptions about God and believe things that are of their own making, or told to them by someone else but aren't really true. Such as that God doesn't really have a sense of humour. Some people are so serious about God. I think God laughs, not to mock us but to laugh with us! After all, Nehemiah 8:10 says the joy of the Lord is our strength and the pslams are filled with references to joy. Luke 10: 21 says "At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure." God is joyful and he always wants good things for his creation. I think there is a ton of happiness in Heaven, after all, there are no tears there.
I also believe that God understands and sympathizes with the pain and trouble we experience on earth. If you ever read the old testament, it's very obvious how much mercy God has on the Isrealites and how frequently he promises to restore them and deliver them from their trouble. Revelation 21:4 says, "He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.” (In reference to when God comes for his people at the end times). This demonstrates to me, and I've felt it during the times when I've been sad, that God is sad too. He cries when we cry; it hurts him to see those he loves so much hurting too.
God is always just and righteous, fair, and punishes for evil. He is completely pure and can't stand anything that tarnishes. I think it's for these reasons that people often take a very harsh view of God and miss out on knowing the lighter side, the part of him that laughs, and acts playfully sometimes. God says we need a childlike faith and if you've ever spent time around kids, you know how silly and plain happy they can be. God is like that. He wants to have fun with us, play games with us. While it's always important to remember God's holiness and strive to remain pure ourselves so as not to disapoint God, we need to embrace the joyful side of God's personality. I firmly believe that God wants us to laugh, play and have fun with him and that when we are doing these things, to thank him for it.
So tell God all your plans today, everything in your heart and then invite him to join you today, and, perhaps, if a good joke comes to mind, tell it to God who loves to laugh!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Monday, March 1, 2010
Adam and Eve
Hey all,
Did it ever bother you to hear someone preach about Adan and Eve, the fall of mankind and blame it all on Eve eating the fruit? Was Adam just an innocent bystander that got sucked into Eve's sin? My question for that is, if Adam was so innocent, then why did he recieve a curse? Well...to recap, let's quickly read over the Bible story.
Genesis 2: 6-7 "The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves." Then God finds them in the garden and asks why they hid from him. They confess it was shame over their nakedness and God knows they ate from the tree he told them not too. Verses 12-13 says: "The man replied, “It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it.' Then the Lord God asked the woman, “What have you done?”' "The serpent deceived me,” she replied. “That’s why I ate it.”" After that, they recieve punishment for their disobedience.
Where was Adam when Eve reached for the fruit and fell into the serpent's trap? He was right beside her. He kept quiet and did not speak up to stop her. Then later, Adam blames God and Eve- 'the woman you gave me..' Both Adam and Eve sinned and both were punished because of it. The first couple on the Earth were having some relationship problems.
Ephesians 5:21-26 says "And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy..." Everyone must be humble and submit to one another but specifically, women need to obey/submit to their husbands. But husbands need to love their wives just like Christ loves his people and gave himself up. Husbands need to give of themselves, sacrifice for their wives. I think these verses are basically saying the same thing to both husbands and wives. Both have to submit and respect each other.
So since God designed that Adam (all males) should take spiritual leadership over their wives, giving of themselves to make her holy. Adam failed in that regard. He did not stand up to the serpent tempting Eve. He allowed the temptation to continue and got sucked into it himself. Imagine what would have happened if Adam told the serpent off- what would Eve do? Would she submit to her husband's leadership or rebel and face the curse?
So what do Adam and Eve teach us? That us girls should just do everything our husband's say? What about when their wrong? Can women teach men? There is a lot of debate in Christian circles about women holding leadership roles (specifically over men) but the fact is, God did call some women into leadership- look at Deborah in Judges. I firmly believe that women can be leaders, can instruct men, we are all 'one' in Christ after all. I think that the focus on submission and male leadership is there because we need to be reminded of our unique abilities that come from our genders. For example, we have to admit that we are often prone to controlling our men, we know what's best or at least we think we do, we take that control- nagging wife?? eh? Well, that's not good. That's not submitting in the least. Men sometimes need our encouragment to take control but girls, having your husband run aspects of the relationship and home, is not a bad thing. God knew women were prone to becoming stressed, worrying too much, overly concerned about things. We have to trust our men and allow them to be the leaders, take the stress off ourselves so we can concentrate on doing our best as wives. Men will do their best as husbands when they feel that they are performing a vital function in the relationship, a needed, necessary, can't function without, type of position. Maybe Eve was prone to taking control and so Adam sat back, thinking he wasn't needed or feeling that he wasn't good enough to take care of his wife.
We all know there are abuses to this functioning too. Where men control everything and make life miserable for their wives but that's not Godly, not Christlike. Christ died for the benefit of his church, a man acting in that capacity is not helping his wife. When leadership becomes a power trip- it's not proper leadership- leadership comes from giving of oneself. The best leader is also a servant. Look at Jesus, washing the feet of his diciplines. The fact that husbands are called to be leaders, means that they are called to be servants- and that's something that's often forgotten.
Anyway, big topic, definately some stuff to mull over. Think about it girls...there is more to the story of Adam and Eve than just the explosion of knowing evil spreading over the world.
Did it ever bother you to hear someone preach about Adan and Eve, the fall of mankind and blame it all on Eve eating the fruit? Was Adam just an innocent bystander that got sucked into Eve's sin? My question for that is, if Adam was so innocent, then why did he recieve a curse? Well...to recap, let's quickly read over the Bible story.
Genesis 2: 6-7 "The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves." Then God finds them in the garden and asks why they hid from him. They confess it was shame over their nakedness and God knows they ate from the tree he told them not too. Verses 12-13 says: "The man replied, “It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it.' Then the Lord God asked the woman, “What have you done?”' "The serpent deceived me,” she replied. “That’s why I ate it.”" After that, they recieve punishment for their disobedience.
Where was Adam when Eve reached for the fruit and fell into the serpent's trap? He was right beside her. He kept quiet and did not speak up to stop her. Then later, Adam blames God and Eve- 'the woman you gave me..' Both Adam and Eve sinned and both were punished because of it. The first couple on the Earth were having some relationship problems.
Ephesians 5:21-26 says "And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy..." Everyone must be humble and submit to one another but specifically, women need to obey/submit to their husbands. But husbands need to love their wives just like Christ loves his people and gave himself up. Husbands need to give of themselves, sacrifice for their wives. I think these verses are basically saying the same thing to both husbands and wives. Both have to submit and respect each other.
So since God designed that Adam (all males) should take spiritual leadership over their wives, giving of themselves to make her holy. Adam failed in that regard. He did not stand up to the serpent tempting Eve. He allowed the temptation to continue and got sucked into it himself. Imagine what would have happened if Adam told the serpent off- what would Eve do? Would she submit to her husband's leadership or rebel and face the curse?
So what do Adam and Eve teach us? That us girls should just do everything our husband's say? What about when their wrong? Can women teach men? There is a lot of debate in Christian circles about women holding leadership roles (specifically over men) but the fact is, God did call some women into leadership- look at Deborah in Judges. I firmly believe that women can be leaders, can instruct men, we are all 'one' in Christ after all. I think that the focus on submission and male leadership is there because we need to be reminded of our unique abilities that come from our genders. For example, we have to admit that we are often prone to controlling our men, we know what's best or at least we think we do, we take that control- nagging wife?? eh? Well, that's not good. That's not submitting in the least. Men sometimes need our encouragment to take control but girls, having your husband run aspects of the relationship and home, is not a bad thing. God knew women were prone to becoming stressed, worrying too much, overly concerned about things. We have to trust our men and allow them to be the leaders, take the stress off ourselves so we can concentrate on doing our best as wives. Men will do their best as husbands when they feel that they are performing a vital function in the relationship, a needed, necessary, can't function without, type of position. Maybe Eve was prone to taking control and so Adam sat back, thinking he wasn't needed or feeling that he wasn't good enough to take care of his wife.
We all know there are abuses to this functioning too. Where men control everything and make life miserable for their wives but that's not Godly, not Christlike. Christ died for the benefit of his church, a man acting in that capacity is not helping his wife. When leadership becomes a power trip- it's not proper leadership- leadership comes from giving of oneself. The best leader is also a servant. Look at Jesus, washing the feet of his diciplines. The fact that husbands are called to be leaders, means that they are called to be servants- and that's something that's often forgotten.
Anyway, big topic, definately some stuff to mull over. Think about it girls...there is more to the story of Adam and Eve than just the explosion of knowing evil spreading over the world.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
God Not Us
Hey Girls,
Did you ever meet someone who called themselves a Christian but acted or spoke in such a way that you were immidiately disapointed and disgusted with them? Did it turn you away from going to their church? Or make you think about God negatively? Well, non Christians and Christians do that all the time with us. They judge God by the example we set. If they see us doing something they don't like, often they sometimes think that if that's the way followers of God act than they don't want any part of God. It's not a good situation for anybody. It makes us Christian feel like we have to achieve an unreal standard when we are human, prone to screwing up like everyone else but at the same time, we know that we have to set the best example we can.
However, all of us have to admit that we do look at other people. Our eyes are on people way too much and not on God enough. Hebrews 12:2 tells us "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." We need to watch Jesus and look for his example. Other Christians can easily misdirect us but by keeping our eyes on the perfecter of our faith, we will grow. We can't look for examples of righteous living from each other. We can only get that from God and the instructions he leaves us in his word (although positive examples from other people greatly aid us).
Yet we do have a responsibility to show a good example to others. We are Christ followers and we want to inspire others to do the same. 1 Cornithians 8:12-13 tells us how important our example is "When you sin against your brothers in this way and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall." This is tough stuff. We have to be so careful about what we do so that we do not lead other Christians, our 'brothers and sisters' (not just non Christians) into sin. We want to point other Christians closer to God, just as with non-Christians.
The Bible tells us that our example has to be different from the world. John 15: 19 says "If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you." The world rejected Jesus so it makes sense if the world rejects us too, meaning, what we do, most often will not gain approval by everyone. We stand against homosexuality, abortion, violence..etc, things the world often embraces. It's not a popular standpoint to have but it is one we must come to terms with having.
How many of us girls just blend in? We don't stand out as Christians and we don't make waves. We try not to offend but at the same time we still hope to remain true to our beliefs. How will anyone recognize you're a Christian when you look and act like everyone else does? What makes you different? Jesus offended a lot of people. It's hard to follow in that example and know that you may be ridiculed because of it.
I'm not saying go find a street corner and start preaching or tell all your coworkers that the world is evil. But what I do believe, and this is kinda tough, is to be open to hearing God. When God gives you a nudge to go pray with that lady you briefly met at walmart or sit down in your lunchroom at school on your knees to pray, I hope that you will be faithful to that. God sometimes does call us to do embrassing things and I hope that I would be faithful too! At other times, being different just means we stand true to our beliefs; when someone asks our opinion on a subject, we can't shy away and give the generalized 'not to offend' version but we have to come out and say exactly what we believe. Often times it's things like that, the little things, the speaking out when we'd rather keep quiet, that has a tendancy to show others our faith (or lack of).
My prayer is that all of my fellow Christians out there will stand strong in their faith. Apathy is perhaps one of the greatest battles we face in our society so must let our examples speak of God's love and care so that others will see and know, without a doubt, that, yes, God is there.
Did you ever meet someone who called themselves a Christian but acted or spoke in such a way that you were immidiately disapointed and disgusted with them? Did it turn you away from going to their church? Or make you think about God negatively? Well, non Christians and Christians do that all the time with us. They judge God by the example we set. If they see us doing something they don't like, often they sometimes think that if that's the way followers of God act than they don't want any part of God. It's not a good situation for anybody. It makes us Christian feel like we have to achieve an unreal standard when we are human, prone to screwing up like everyone else but at the same time, we know that we have to set the best example we can.
However, all of us have to admit that we do look at other people. Our eyes are on people way too much and not on God enough. Hebrews 12:2 tells us "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." We need to watch Jesus and look for his example. Other Christians can easily misdirect us but by keeping our eyes on the perfecter of our faith, we will grow. We can't look for examples of righteous living from each other. We can only get that from God and the instructions he leaves us in his word (although positive examples from other people greatly aid us).
Yet we do have a responsibility to show a good example to others. We are Christ followers and we want to inspire others to do the same. 1 Cornithians 8:12-13 tells us how important our example is "When you sin against your brothers in this way and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall." This is tough stuff. We have to be so careful about what we do so that we do not lead other Christians, our 'brothers and sisters' (not just non Christians) into sin. We want to point other Christians closer to God, just as with non-Christians.
The Bible tells us that our example has to be different from the world. John 15: 19 says "If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you." The world rejected Jesus so it makes sense if the world rejects us too, meaning, what we do, most often will not gain approval by everyone. We stand against homosexuality, abortion, violence..etc, things the world often embraces. It's not a popular standpoint to have but it is one we must come to terms with having.
How many of us girls just blend in? We don't stand out as Christians and we don't make waves. We try not to offend but at the same time we still hope to remain true to our beliefs. How will anyone recognize you're a Christian when you look and act like everyone else does? What makes you different? Jesus offended a lot of people. It's hard to follow in that example and know that you may be ridiculed because of it.
I'm not saying go find a street corner and start preaching or tell all your coworkers that the world is evil. But what I do believe, and this is kinda tough, is to be open to hearing God. When God gives you a nudge to go pray with that lady you briefly met at walmart or sit down in your lunchroom at school on your knees to pray, I hope that you will be faithful to that. God sometimes does call us to do embrassing things and I hope that I would be faithful too! At other times, being different just means we stand true to our beliefs; when someone asks our opinion on a subject, we can't shy away and give the generalized 'not to offend' version but we have to come out and say exactly what we believe. Often times it's things like that, the little things, the speaking out when we'd rather keep quiet, that has a tendancy to show others our faith (or lack of).
My prayer is that all of my fellow Christians out there will stand strong in their faith. Apathy is perhaps one of the greatest battles we face in our society so must let our examples speak of God's love and care so that others will see and know, without a doubt, that, yes, God is there.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
When Christian Friends Fall
Hi Girls,
Ever had a friend who grew up Christian, seemed focused on God and into following his word? Then as they grow up, they drift away from God and eventually just live a lifetsyle society approves of? Or maybe you thought everything was good with your friend and God and one day, they make a 'unchristian' decision and you suddenly realize that they are further from God than you original believed?
I've had friends like this and it is such a sad situation when you see a Christian girl (or guy) fall away from God and begin to make choices that you know don't please God. What do you do? Some people take offense to being told that they are not acting according to God's design for our lives and this causes breaks in the friendship. Others actually benefit from correction and your pointing out their mistake plants a seed that one day helps them to come around. I have to confess, I find this a terribly difficult situation and I have a hard time knowing what to do.
Just a side note here, we are talking about Christians only because non Christians did not make a promise to follow God. The Bible says in Matthew 18: 15-17 that “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector." This is pretty intense but the keywords here are 'sins against you'. If the offense is not personal, than this act of confrontation and shunning because of unrepentance for sin, should not occur (although you always have to forgive them even if they don't repent). Anyway, back on topic. So when my friend made bad life choices- ex. moving in with boyfriend- what do I do?
Matthew 7:1-3 says "Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you treat others.The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged. And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own?" Okay, so this establishes that we should not sit in judgement about our friends. If my friend is lying, drinking (as in getting drunk), carrying on in other inappropriate ways- I shouldn't sit back and tell them what a horrible Christian and what a bad person they are. Hello! I make mistakes too! God views all sin equally so if I harshly judge my friends' mistakes, than God will harshly judge mine.
So what does this mean? Do I need to just sit back and watch my friends sin? I honestly don't believe that is right. I believe when we see our Christian friends making mistakes, it's important that they know we don't agree with them. For example, I have friends who are sleeping with their boyfriends and I think it's important that they know I don't agree with that lifestyle according to Biblical references but at the same time, it is not my place to criticize them for it. All I can do is point out what the Bible says. Overall, I think the best option is to pray for them because God will inspire repentance in their lives. I can't do that. I do not need to support them in their sin, just like they shouldn't give validation to the things I do wrong. It's the sin in my friends life that's wrong, not them personally. God can change people and I just have to pray that my friend will be willing, while at the same time, trying to live as pleasing to God as I can. And, we all have to try to be as humble and repentant as we can too.
I just hope all the girls out there will stay strong against the temptations to sin in the first place and that we will encourage each other not too. For example, ever had a Christian friend who moved in with their boyfriend and promised that they would still wait for marriage to have sex? Bet that didn't last too long- putting yourself in temptations way is not good at all. And we really need to help each other to stand strong against many temptations to sin (and not just with boys) or even temptations to practise harmful behaviours (like being overly critical of ourselves or even too bossy). This is all pretty difficult stuff to practise and deal with but it's important we're there for each other just like God is always there for us!
Ever had a friend who grew up Christian, seemed focused on God and into following his word? Then as they grow up, they drift away from God and eventually just live a lifetsyle society approves of? Or maybe you thought everything was good with your friend and God and one day, they make a 'unchristian' decision and you suddenly realize that they are further from God than you original believed?
I've had friends like this and it is such a sad situation when you see a Christian girl (or guy) fall away from God and begin to make choices that you know don't please God. What do you do? Some people take offense to being told that they are not acting according to God's design for our lives and this causes breaks in the friendship. Others actually benefit from correction and your pointing out their mistake plants a seed that one day helps them to come around. I have to confess, I find this a terribly difficult situation and I have a hard time knowing what to do.
Just a side note here, we are talking about Christians only because non Christians did not make a promise to follow God. The Bible says in Matthew 18: 15-17 that “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector." This is pretty intense but the keywords here are 'sins against you'. If the offense is not personal, than this act of confrontation and shunning because of unrepentance for sin, should not occur (although you always have to forgive them even if they don't repent). Anyway, back on topic. So when my friend made bad life choices- ex. moving in with boyfriend- what do I do?
Matthew 7:1-3 says "Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you treat others.The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged. And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own?" Okay, so this establishes that we should not sit in judgement about our friends. If my friend is lying, drinking (as in getting drunk), carrying on in other inappropriate ways- I shouldn't sit back and tell them what a horrible Christian and what a bad person they are. Hello! I make mistakes too! God views all sin equally so if I harshly judge my friends' mistakes, than God will harshly judge mine.
So what does this mean? Do I need to just sit back and watch my friends sin? I honestly don't believe that is right. I believe when we see our Christian friends making mistakes, it's important that they know we don't agree with them. For example, I have friends who are sleeping with their boyfriends and I think it's important that they know I don't agree with that lifestyle according to Biblical references but at the same time, it is not my place to criticize them for it. All I can do is point out what the Bible says. Overall, I think the best option is to pray for them because God will inspire repentance in their lives. I can't do that. I do not need to support them in their sin, just like they shouldn't give validation to the things I do wrong. It's the sin in my friends life that's wrong, not them personally. God can change people and I just have to pray that my friend will be willing, while at the same time, trying to live as pleasing to God as I can. And, we all have to try to be as humble and repentant as we can too.
I just hope all the girls out there will stay strong against the temptations to sin in the first place and that we will encourage each other not too. For example, ever had a Christian friend who moved in with their boyfriend and promised that they would still wait for marriage to have sex? Bet that didn't last too long- putting yourself in temptations way is not good at all. And we really need to help each other to stand strong against many temptations to sin (and not just with boys) or even temptations to practise harmful behaviours (like being overly critical of ourselves or even too bossy). This is all pretty difficult stuff to practise and deal with but it's important we're there for each other just like God is always there for us!
Friday, February 26, 2010
Tidbits of Stuff
Hi all,
Back from Florida, from another long long drive and glad to see that there was snow on the ground when I got home. Oh, another note, I tried to put this quiz thing on my blog to see what kinda topics I should look into posting more often so if you could, check off your response on the quiz. Basically I usually try to post what I feel God leading me to and I hope that it encourages those who read it.
Anyway, I didn't really give this post today a topic because, well, I didn't have just one topic. I was thinking about my relationship with my husband and realized that we did things pretty different from-well, everyone I know. We met at the end of June two years ago and then started dating 2 weeks later in July, four months from then in Nov. we were engaged and then married 6 weeks later in early Jan. Pretty fast eh? Well, when you know, you know. When God confirms the relationship, I think it's best that we let him determine the pace of it. Both of us did not really enjoy dating. I don't understand how people can handle dating for long periods of time- four months was enough for us! We just wanted to be married and dating seemed like this formality, this step that we had to get through.
This is why I don't really believe in dating for long periods of time or being engaged for a long time either. It's understandable when two people are separated- long distance dating (which is what we were, I was in Ontario and he was in BC) . God does not want us to live in temptation with each other; he designed men and women to marry. So when God confirms a relationship, I think that we should just sit back and let him control the timing. I think many people date for too long, or get engaged for too long (yes, weddings take time to plan, but honestly, what's more important, the man or the ceremony?). Lots of people worry about having enough money to get married- you don't need money! God provides. Trust me, we married with basically nothing, I had some savings but we had no car, both of us were students, no jobs... you get the picture. Money should never stop you from doing what God wants you to do. He wants you to marry. He'll iron out the details. People would save themselves a lot of heartache if they didn't let money get in the way of their relationship.
There is another misconception out there about relationships. Some people seem to be under the impression that once you get married, all the problems you had while dating go away. Anyone who is married should tell you that isn't true. The problems you have when you're dating, you'll still have when your married. They'll just be different since you're situations changed. If there is a communication problem- you'll want to solve that asap because it will only get worse in marriage, or any other problem, which is why many people advocate marriage counselling. I believe some of us definately benefit from that. Although I can't comment on it because we were offered only one afternoon of it (I didn't want it honestly). We had a rather unusual circumstance in that because while dating long distance, we would talk almost everday, on the phone from 8 until 12 at night- that changed sometimes,- and we would talk on msn during the day. My husband calculated that our talking would amount to about 10 days of non stop conversation approximately! Crazy eh? We dealt with every single issue in those conversation (basically covered all the stuff in the marriage books we read). With that much yaking, we thought we knew each other pretty darn well. And we did but nothing prepared us for actually experiencing being married.
I often thought to myself that marriage changed everything and nothing at the same time. It's a odd sentiment and I can't really describe it. Somethings stayed the same but other things were completely different. We found out so much about each other and more as time went on. Sometimes it seems as if young couples, like engaged or newly married, act as if they have everything figured out. Do they have a surprise in store for them! Nothing can really prepare you for the challenges that marriage brings or the changes. It's something that you just have to experience. And these things don't happen all at once, as the years or months go by of being married, new challenges arise. Dating can be difficult, but marriage is probably harder. When you're bonded to someone for the rest of your life, everything that effects them, effects you and it's true what the Bible says in Mark 10:7-9 "This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife and the two are united into one. Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” Being 'one' is more than just sexual and it's something that takes a long time to learn. It effects every decision, all choices, and even the way you treat the other person.
Falling in love and marrying someone is a great adventure. Yet in order for it to bring us joy and happiness, we have to let God be at the center of it, leading us. And we have to learn from God the skills and tools we need, such as forgiveness, selflessness, and honesty. It's terribly sad that people let their marriages end in divorce, giving up, taking control away from God. So for any of you girls out there experiencing this stuff, or thinking about your future, hopefully our example will encourage you in some way and that you will know God is with you every step of the way.
Back from Florida, from another long long drive and glad to see that there was snow on the ground when I got home. Oh, another note, I tried to put this quiz thing on my blog to see what kinda topics I should look into posting more often so if you could, check off your response on the quiz. Basically I usually try to post what I feel God leading me to and I hope that it encourages those who read it.
Anyway, I didn't really give this post today a topic because, well, I didn't have just one topic. I was thinking about my relationship with my husband and realized that we did things pretty different from-well, everyone I know. We met at the end of June two years ago and then started dating 2 weeks later in July, four months from then in Nov. we were engaged and then married 6 weeks later in early Jan. Pretty fast eh? Well, when you know, you know. When God confirms the relationship, I think it's best that we let him determine the pace of it. Both of us did not really enjoy dating. I don't understand how people can handle dating for long periods of time- four months was enough for us! We just wanted to be married and dating seemed like this formality, this step that we had to get through.
This is why I don't really believe in dating for long periods of time or being engaged for a long time either. It's understandable when two people are separated- long distance dating (which is what we were, I was in Ontario and he was in BC) . God does not want us to live in temptation with each other; he designed men and women to marry. So when God confirms a relationship, I think that we should just sit back and let him control the timing. I think many people date for too long, or get engaged for too long (yes, weddings take time to plan, but honestly, what's more important, the man or the ceremony?). Lots of people worry about having enough money to get married- you don't need money! God provides. Trust me, we married with basically nothing, I had some savings but we had no car, both of us were students, no jobs... you get the picture. Money should never stop you from doing what God wants you to do. He wants you to marry. He'll iron out the details. People would save themselves a lot of heartache if they didn't let money get in the way of their relationship.
There is another misconception out there about relationships. Some people seem to be under the impression that once you get married, all the problems you had while dating go away. Anyone who is married should tell you that isn't true. The problems you have when you're dating, you'll still have when your married. They'll just be different since you're situations changed. If there is a communication problem- you'll want to solve that asap because it will only get worse in marriage, or any other problem, which is why many people advocate marriage counselling. I believe some of us definately benefit from that. Although I can't comment on it because we were offered only one afternoon of it (I didn't want it honestly). We had a rather unusual circumstance in that because while dating long distance, we would talk almost everday, on the phone from 8 until 12 at night- that changed sometimes,- and we would talk on msn during the day. My husband calculated that our talking would amount to about 10 days of non stop conversation approximately! Crazy eh? We dealt with every single issue in those conversation (basically covered all the stuff in the marriage books we read). With that much yaking, we thought we knew each other pretty darn well. And we did but nothing prepared us for actually experiencing being married.
I often thought to myself that marriage changed everything and nothing at the same time. It's a odd sentiment and I can't really describe it. Somethings stayed the same but other things were completely different. We found out so much about each other and more as time went on. Sometimes it seems as if young couples, like engaged or newly married, act as if they have everything figured out. Do they have a surprise in store for them! Nothing can really prepare you for the challenges that marriage brings or the changes. It's something that you just have to experience. And these things don't happen all at once, as the years or months go by of being married, new challenges arise. Dating can be difficult, but marriage is probably harder. When you're bonded to someone for the rest of your life, everything that effects them, effects you and it's true what the Bible says in Mark 10:7-9 "This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife and the two are united into one. Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” Being 'one' is more than just sexual and it's something that takes a long time to learn. It effects every decision, all choices, and even the way you treat the other person.
Falling in love and marrying someone is a great adventure. Yet in order for it to bring us joy and happiness, we have to let God be at the center of it, leading us. And we have to learn from God the skills and tools we need, such as forgiveness, selflessness, and honesty. It's terribly sad that people let their marriages end in divorce, giving up, taking control away from God. So for any of you girls out there experiencing this stuff, or thinking about your future, hopefully our example will encourage you in some way and that you will know God is with you every step of the way.
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